So, yesterday I worried. Today I worried. A week ago I worried........ I don't think that there isn't a day that goes by that I don't worry in. I worry about money, my job, having a family; anything you can think of to worry about, I've been there. It's not that I want to worry, it just comes naturally I guess. I know that it isn't healthy and will only age me more. I don't want to be a worry wart. A lot of times I think a lot about those verses in the Bible that talk about "consider the birds of the air....." Basically the birds don't ever have to worry about where their food or shelter will come from because God has provided it for them. If you've ever sat outside at a restaurant, or fed ducks at a pond you know what I'm talking about. Birds build nests from bits and pieces of what they find on their own, but God gave it all to them. Nothing they have came from anything they did, but because God provided their every need. Why then do I still worry?
I grew up in a Christian household and I went to a Christian school. I knew God and I knew all the stories in the Bible that would fully back up His credibility. Yet why would I ever doubt that He had only the best in store for me and He had already provided me a fantastic future. There were days when I was 14 or 15 years old thinking that He didn't want me to have a driver's license and I was worried I wouldn't get to turn 16. I was worried that I wouldn't live to have a boyfriend, see the age of 21 and drink (big deal, right?), get married, etc. God has proven Himself time and time again to me. I am 28 years old, I am married to the most wonderful man in the world(3 years next tuesday 12/16), I own my house, I live in Texas....what more could I ask for? There's always more apparently.
With all that I have and all that I've been given I still long to have a child and to be a mother. I want to grow to be a "fat" pregnant person. I want to feel that baby wiggle and hiccup inside of me. I want to go through every symptom that is associated with being pregnant. I want a baby shower. I want to give my parents a grandchild. But I have no control over this. I get frustrated almost every day with my "situation". I have good days and I have bad days. There isn't a month that doesn't go by where I don't think "what if I get pregnant this month?" and it doesn't happen. The cycle happens all over again and so on. One day I know that God will prove Himself again and I will have that baby. Matt and I will have family and that baby will be more loved and appreciated than I could ever say. God will provide. No need for me to worry (even though I do). I must continue to trust Him and believe in Him and His miraculous provision.
1
1
A Starting Off Point
Monday, November 17, 2008So, I have decided to start a blog about my every day life here in Texas. I have been enjoying my dear friend, Daniella Summer's blog and she has inspired me to start one of my own. So here goes.....
I think that most of you know that I'm not originally from Texas and neither is Matt. I was born and raised in Sacramento, CA for the first 26 years of my life; Matt was born and raised in Mississippi. Matt and I met in Jackson, MS in December of 2004 and married a year later on December 16, 2005 (so we're almost at three years...amazing!!). We lived in CA together for a year and a half until he had an amazing job opportunity in Texas with Verizon Wireless! The job was available in Schertz, TX and I had no idea where that was, so for those of you who also have no idea it is pretty much in between San Antonio and Austin (a lil' closer to SA, but I like Austin better). We bought a house a few months after we moved and we're very happy here!
It's been almost two years since we've moved and I have seen a pretty good bit of the Lone Star State. I know that I would definitely be at home in the Dallas/Fort Worth area, especially Grapevine or Southlake. Austin is definitely a "little blue oasis in a sea of red" it reminds me of CA a lot, so if I'm ever missing home I like to drive a little bit and hang around there! San Antonio is fine and all, but I kind of feel jipped by living here especially when I go to DFW, Houston or Austin. Those other cities just seem to have way more things to do, places to shop and churches to go to! The day may come when we end up in the DFW Metroplex, but until then visiting from time to time will have to suffice.
I think that's it for now, but there will be more to come. This is kind of fun! I feel like I can ramble and no one will care, so this is like journaling I spose'? Anyway, more to come....stay tuned and stuff!
I think that most of you know that I'm not originally from Texas and neither is Matt. I was born and raised in Sacramento, CA for the first 26 years of my life; Matt was born and raised in Mississippi. Matt and I met in Jackson, MS in December of 2004 and married a year later on December 16, 2005 (so we're almost at three years...amazing!!). We lived in CA together for a year and a half until he had an amazing job opportunity in Texas with Verizon Wireless! The job was available in Schertz, TX and I had no idea where that was, so for those of you who also have no idea it is pretty much in between San Antonio and Austin (a lil' closer to SA, but I like Austin better). We bought a house a few months after we moved and we're very happy here!
It's been almost two years since we've moved and I have seen a pretty good bit of the Lone Star State. I know that I would definitely be at home in the Dallas/Fort Worth area, especially Grapevine or Southlake. Austin is definitely a "little blue oasis in a sea of red" it reminds me of CA a lot, so if I'm ever missing home I like to drive a little bit and hang around there! San Antonio is fine and all, but I kind of feel jipped by living here especially when I go to DFW, Houston or Austin. Those other cities just seem to have way more things to do, places to shop and churches to go to! The day may come when we end up in the DFW Metroplex, but until then visiting from time to time will have to suffice.
I think that's it for now, but there will be more to come. This is kind of fun! I feel like I can ramble and no one will care, so this is like journaling I spose'? Anyway, more to come....stay tuned and stuff!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
